Thursday, August 9, 2012

What if...

Thursday and Friday's are my cleaning up/errand running days. I know I'm lucky to have them but sometimes I just feel like these days fly by and all I do is spin my wheels all day long...and even though I feel like I've accomplished a lot, I look around my house and feel like I've really accomplished nothing at all.
After I finally got Tripp to take a nap this afternoon...lately he's decided to scream and beg to be released from his prison I like to call his crib...I started picking up the living room. I stumbled upon the remains of Tripp's lunch...at this point it was 3pm, we had left after lunch to get hair cuts and then returned home...so apparently these were left for the cat...or the rodents which I'm sure will be moving in soon!

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Then I looked around the living room...

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And into my kitchen...

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And my kitchen sink, which rarely is without a dirty sippy cup...which while very bright and colorful, it still drives me bonkers to never see this house clean for more than 48 hours.

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And if I have to hear Ruth Ann call me from the other end of the house one more time to come wipe her after she poops I think I might run screaming through the neighborhood!

I read several blogs, and the ones I enjoy most are the ones that keep it real. The ones that paint pictures of perfect children, perfect husbands and perfect home lives drive me crazy...and I've removed a few of those from my Google Reader.

But as I looked around my house today my mind started to wander and I started thinking "Is this really where I wanted to be at 33...picking up discarded food and cleaning cups filled with spoiled milk?"...then I start playing the "What if..." game.

Arch and I were set up on a blind date...what if I had been too scared to date someone with an 8 year old child? I lived in Alabama for 6 years before moving back home...what if I had decided to stay in Auburn to look for a job after graduate school? After my freshman year at Auburn I got incredibly homesick, applied to Clemson, got accepted and began making plans to transfer...what if I had not chickened out as I was packing up my dorm room and decided to stay at Auburn?

Had I moved in 1997, I would never had met some friends who are some of my very best friends, even to this day...Erin, Candi and Andrea, I'm looking at you! Had I moved to Clemson I would not have been able to major in Audiology since this was not a major they offered and I would not have met the hundreds of patients I helped in the last 10 years. Had I said no to the opportunity to meet Arch I would not have met the man who, despite all his faults, still loves me despite all my faults too. And I wouldn't have my two little hooligans who leave food out and who seem to love playing sippy cup hide and seek. I know it's the Devil who loves to let our minds wander and imagine a life better than the one we're living...those are all false promises...and I much as I get frustrated at picking up the same trucks and baby dolls all afternoon long...I loved the little hands that push those same toy trucks around the living room and the little arms that pretend to rock those baby dolls to sleep.

So is this where I thought my life would be at 33?? Yep, but hearing my sweet babies say "Momma" is way better than I ever thought it would be...even if it's to call me to come wipe their hiney!

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